ShameSat at five am eating a cheese burger with a knife and fork - my mum walks in. She doesn't question it but nonetheless it's suddenly impossible to swallow as my throat fills with shame and contracts with the strength of my self loathing. What are you doing? I am not sure, I was anxious so I couldn't sleep and suddenly the idea popped into my head and then it was all I could think about until eventually I figured I wouldn't get to sleep unless I got it over with.
Sometimes, often, I cry when I eat. As I put larded handfuls to my lips I hear someone in my head screaming; what are you doing?
I feel nauseous now. Not intentionally, although I am certain that my binge eating is both emotional and disorderly, but as a pool of disgust wriggles in my flabby stomach.
I try to be honest, in fact I am known for it, but every once in a while I write something so true that the thought of releasing an inventory of my flaws into a starscape of eager critics makes me sick to my eyeballs, so I close th
Lady Rogues HandbookLady Rogue's Handbook
To expand on the Rogue's Handbook located at http://www.true-magic.com/writing/rogue.php , this one's for the ladies!
I will not masquerade as a heroine, as that would encourage the villain to target me first. I'll let the Hero take point.
I will not join the side of the Villain. He would either be abusive towards me, or I would be killed in the crossfire of his and the Hero's epic final battle.
If we are attacked, I will be sure to give at least one loud shriek so the Hero's natural instinct to protect damsels in distress will kick in and I'll have a nice solid shield of flesh swinging a sword around for me and attracting our attacker's attention while I quietly dispatch the enemies I can reach while staying behind him.
I WILL NOT FALL IN LOVE WITH THE HERO.
I WILL NOT HAVE SEX WITH THE HERO. Doing such would make him declare me his one true love, and he would spend all his time trying to convince me to leave my rougish ways behind to become the ideal woma