If you know what this is, I just ask that you refrain from saying anything about what it is specifically.
This... this used to have meaning for me and now it's little more than a technical exercise. It sat around on my computer forever and I decided to finish it.
So... let's just say this is a tribute to all my closest friends. I had a really hard time last semester, and the ones who stood by me and supported me even though you were hundreds and sometimes thousands of miles away, you helped me through one of the worst times in my life. And at least one of you helped me to your detriment, and for that I am so sorry.
The end of last year I was broken. So broken. I couldn't hear someone yell or argue without tearing up and having to hide. I had constant struggles with suicidal thoughts and resisting the urge to mutilate myself by picking up cutting or some other equally horrid addiction.
For those who supported me and got me through it despite how I was, you have my eternal gratitude and love. To the one who supported me the most despite how much harm it did him, I can't express how sorry I am.
I am feeling better than I've felt in a long, long time. Two months ago I was fragile and weak. Now I feel empowered enough to finally admit to myself what needs to be done to get better. It feels like the crumbling graphite in my chest is being melted down and pressed in until the carbon rearranges to forge me into something stronger than what I was.